Is It Me? Book Studies Have Been Discontinued

You can still purchase the book and companion workbook on Amazon. Below is a summary of the chapter content. If you are in a painful and confusing marriage, please visit for more resources.

Chapter 1

Is This Your Marriage?

We'll start off by diving into the characteristics of an emotionally and spiritually abusive marriage. You'll learn how to recognize covert abuse and abusive patterns of behavior. This may not be an easy chapter to read and process, but it's an important step in your ultimate recovery.


Chapter 2

What Does a Normal Marriage Look Like?

Well, for starters, it's not confusing. In this chapter, you'll learn the six characteristics of a normal, healthy Christian marriage. Because when you've been living in crazy land for so long, it's hard to know sometimes. 


Chapter 3

The Propaganda Machine


This chapter will blow your mind. We'll take a close look at some of the most common beliefs Christian women are programmed with in order to keep them from entering into their full identity and power through Christ. You are more manipulatable if you believe the Bible teaches things it doesn't. But the Truth will set you free. 

Chapter 4

His Role


Chapter four takes an up-close look at what makes your partner tick. What does he do? How do his behaviors reveal what he believes about himself? What he believes about marriage and women? What he believes about you? What are the consequences of his chronic patterns of behavior? And most importantly, the million-dollar question...

Can he change?             
Chapter 5

Your Role


You might think this chapter is going to define you as weak, powerless, and small. But that wouldn't be telling the truth. The emotional abuse victim is incredibly resilient, responsible, forgiving, and empathetic. You'll read about your strengths and why they were the reason you were targeted in the first place. If you've been erased, this chapter will help you see who you really are.

Chapter 6

The Roles of Others

Your emotionally abusive relationship depends on an unspoken agreement between your partner and your church, family, friends, counselors, and community. He agrees to treat them nice, and they agree to look the other way when you come forward to expose his behavior. This leaves you on your own to fight for your sanity and safety. Find out how and why others believe the abuser over the victim most of the time.

Chapter 7

God's Role


Wonder where God is in this mess? In this chapter you'll learn about God's view of women, what the Bible says about abuse, and what God thinks about marriage and divorce. But most importantly, what does God think about you? Does He care about your marriage more than He cares about the lives within that marriage? You'll discover that God is nothing like your abuser. 

Chapter 8

Changing Your Role


It takes tremendous courage to break free from long-held beliefs and life-long patterns of behavior designed to protect you from core pain. Survivors learn, sometimes for the first time, how to stand alone. Fear is part of this journey, but so is love. As you begin to make changes in how you show up in the relationship, you discover that God's love is strong enough to hold you together. He wants you to be who HE created you to be!

Chapter 9

House of Cards


This chapter is all about what happens when the survivor changes her role. Basically, it's about the proverbial you-know-what hitting the fan. There will be an explosion, and it won't be comfortable. This chapter is a "heads-up" so you're prepared and equipped when it happens. Because a lot of people won't like it when you finally start to realize and live into being the adult you are. 

Chapter 10

The Key to Your Future


The key is YOU. Your identity has been neglected for so long - perhaps all of your life. Other people sprayed graffiti all over the walls of your life, and now it's time to clean it all up and make it yours again. This isn't selfish. This is wise stewardship. This chapter will give you an exciting vision for how you can begin the process of being YOU. 

Chapter 11

What Comes Next? 

Find out how you can get more information and support while you navigate your painful marriage. You're not alone anymore.